Last night I had a nightmare and I didn’t want to go back to sleep because I thought it would continue. I was in a boat going through hatches to get to someone and I had gotten through one of the hatches and looked back to see a man coming out of the bedroom closet (you know how dreams are?) with a hatchet in his hand. I awoke in fear. I have been wrestling with one relationship in my life and I was wondering if that wrestling was coming out in a bizarre dream somehow.
The day before I had read Ann Voskamp’s reading for the 9th day of Advent. Here is what stuck me to the core:
You can stand around a Christmas tree with a family tree like Joseph’s, with cheaters and beaters and deceivers, with a family like Jacob’s, who ran away and ran around and ran folks down. But out of a family line that looks like a mess, God brings the Messiah. What was intended to harm, God intended all of it for good, and no matter what intends to harm you, God’s arms have you. You can never be undone….
‘If the worst things work for good to a believer, what shall the best things?’ writes Puritan Thomas Watson. ‘Nothing hurts the godly…all things…shall co-operate for their good, that their crosses shall be turned into blessings.’
And so my friend (who was like a sister to me) was running around, left her children and husband and took up with the one she was running with. Now she is married to him and shares custody of her children with her former husband. She has accepted Jesus as her Savior through her new husband’s influence and she posts video on Facebook of her teen daughter singing worship songs. Well, I have to tell you, I struggled with all this until Ann opened my eyes to the likes of the line of the Lion of Judah. Then the woman who washed Jesus feet with her hair flashed through my mind and it looked like my friend kneeling there at Jesus’ feet. I remember Jesus saying, “She who is forgiven much, loves much.” Hmmmmm, and He looked at me and said, “Simon, when I came in your house you did not kiss me, you did not wash my feet…”
I was brought up short on this one. I like how Peter says to Jesus in the movie Jesus of Nazareth, “Oh Lord I am just a stupid man.”